Hey First Time Mama

A friend is waiting to have her first baby any time now and a popular blog I read often asks participants what advice they would give a first time mama and only now am I kind of ready to attempt answering that.

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1. A birth plan is great, but don’t be too tied to it, things happen so be flexible.
2. Have a plan for who you want to visit you once baby comes. Be clear what you expect and what you would like.
3. If your mom or sister, or other trusted female relative can come, let them. In laws are great but for the first one its nice to have someone you are closely related to.
4. Have someone who loves you look out for post natal depression. It’s  a reality.
5. Little kids don’t need too much stuff and they outgrow stuff so quickly so don’t over shop it might all go to waste.
6. If you have a partner, your communication will take a bit of a knock but resolve to work on it and adapt together.
7. Babies cry. Soon you will develop a tough skin when they do. When you can’t settle them, give them a bath or strip them of their clothes for a little while.
8. Lastly, you are the best mama for that baby. No one can do it better than you. YOU GOT THIS.

 

Monday Motivation

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A little faith in the hand of a big God is Powerful!!

Wives also need to get Wives

Husbands/ fathers/ partners are good but we all need wives.

Sunday Listens (Podcast edition)

Over the holiday I got a bit tired of listening to the same subscribed podcast content so I challenged myself to listen to shows I wouldn’t normally do or I had heard but did not want to commit to full subscription just yet. So here are some of those fantastic episodes.

• Young Love – Where should we begin by Esther Perel.
• I felt my back stand up when I first listened to her views on infidelity so I wasn’t open at all but I liked it so much I listened to this other episode on sexlessness.
• Radio Diaries’ Teenage Diariesrevisited. I love that kind of radio soooo much. I was hanging on the edge of my seat listening. Definitely subscribing.  As a teen I would have loved to participate in such an activity, to be honest, even now I would.
• Other episode I loved was Thembi’s Diary.
• BBC Woman’s Hour had a phone-in on Monday on #Megxit. Hot mess.
• I love that Motherhood Sessions is back but jeez that first episode? Messy.
• Borders Between Us by The Nod stressed to me how as parents we do the best for our kids and hope.
• I have been listening to this podcast following three pregnant teens (ethics and judgment suspended) and in this episode we meet four generations of teen moms in one family. Give it a listen, it’s nothing like what you expect.
• Still Processingdiscussed Michelle Obama’s book Becoming. JUST GO AND LISTEN. IT’S GOOD.

I know it’s a lot but do yourself a favour and just listen.

Three (maybe, four) thoughts on Grace

At Church we are covering a series on Grace and so far the study has reminded me of two things that I would like to share today.

The definition of grace is “unearned, unmerited and undeserved kindness and favour of God.” Grace is free and has all to do with God and His love for us a sinful, unfaithful and undeserving people.

Sometimes we forget this meaning and so it’s the third thing that we often forget and so I thought it wise to begin there. Now onto the things that I have actually learnt.

1. No sin is bigger than God’s grace. There is nothing that we can do that will set us apart from the grace of God. Because if there were, it would negate the very definition of grace.
2. We have to accept this grace on our own behalf. In that sense it’s personal but it’s also possible that you can reject it and miss out because we choose the penalty (death – the wage for sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ [Rom 6:23]) over and over again.
3. Lastly, due to our nature, we can get very transactional with God. If you do this, I will ….  I thought I didn’t do this but I see that I quite often do this I still bargain and negotiate and try to “please” God so I am slowly learning to rest in His completed work and to be still.

I pray that I continue to meditate on these truths always.

Friday Moving Music

This song is giving me pause in this season of my life. God still moves, He still works, He breaks all chains and He can work even where situations seem dead and hopeless.

Podcast Recommendations

​I love podcasts and on my commute to work and back home, I have been catching up on some good episodes this week.

• I love Ear Hustle and this week they had a Q&A session, I particularly loved the bit where they went round asking the guys what their prison theme song would be. If this is you first time, the boom boom room is definitely my all-time favourite episode.
• This is Uncomfortable, a new podcast I got into was talking about class anxiety. Something that I can definitely associate with. Well, I loved how the lady in question just broke it down in a way that made me think of my own discomfort with money.
• Aminatou and Ann also talked about all the money feelings we have. One of their subjects was saying how they sit with a group of their friends and everyone writes down their annual salary, they jumble them up and pick them out say them aloud so even if you do not know who earns that much, you at least know they are in your friendship circle. Mind-blowing, would love to see the same from my friends.
• Woman’s Hour talked about period sex – the good, the dirty and freaky J
• The Mr is left handed so this episode from Radio Lab hit me personally. The previous two stories were also quite impressive.

Happy Listening 🙂

Happy Hump Day

Enjoy these beautiful baby pics from a very gloomy Johannesburg

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Sunday Reads

• Waiting on God patiently.
• What is a “love puff“?
• Dealing with death
• What do you do with your kids’ art?
• To spank or not? (NYT article)

3 Current Truths about God

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In this season of late nights and quiet early mornings, of little cries and fussy babies I am learning three truths about God and really reflecting on that.

1. God the Creator. Throughout the pregnancy I have seen how God creates little beautiful people and the level of care and His great attention to detail. His ways make sense and when you read the Science behind it all, you cannot help but worship Him deeper and love Him even more.
2. God the Provider. Isaiah 49:15 talks about how just as mother will never forget the child she is breastfeeding so also God will never forget us and will always show us compassion because He has engraved us on the palms of His hands. God knows all the details of our lives and He sees to all our needs from the small to the large. He is our Source and Sustainor.
3. God is Love. I love my daughter and it sometimes overwhelms me just how much the little lady has captivated us and then I think that God loves me even more than that. That He loved me so much that He sent His only begotten Son to die for me. Oh how He loves us!!

What does God mean to you as we approach this Easter season?

 

Sunday Reads

In light of the new phase I am in presently,I decided to share parenting-related articles

• The benefits of living close to grandparents.
• Explaining to those around you your child’s’ disability.
• HONY doing a great job highlighting children with special needs at the Special Olympics being held at UAE.
• I thought a helicopter parent was not great, now there is snowplow parenting.
  • Snowplow Parents are More Common Than We Thought. America Is Doomed
  • Snowplow Parenting Isn’t Just Morally Repulsive, It’s Bad For Kids
  • How some celebrities counter snowplow parenting.
• Moms still need to depend on God.
• Note to self: However tough, enjoy these early days of motherhood and be easy on yourself.
• This is me, at the moment.
• What to Do When Your Kid Walks in on You Having Sex (Which Will Happen)
• Baby songs for infants and parents.

Sunday Reads

• RTWT – Read The Whole Thread
• I suppose middle class parents mean well but the cost of intensive parenting is rather steep.
• Loved the reasons that kids threw tantrums, so hilarious but i suppose not for the parents.
• I want to check out this Art bar in Braamfontein.
• Being a good friend at all times is quite tough but beneficial.
• An ode to female friendships

Recipes

• 10 Homemade Salad Dressing Recipes
• Banana Bread Muffins
• We all need some quick weekday or actually, in general recipes
• Some more pasta recipes.

Passion catches

I love it when I watch people do anything, however odd or random, that totally absorbs them and that fully consumes them, like this guy in the video.

 

Beware of language though ..

Sunday Reads

• How do you talk to kids about attacks on their faith?
• Economics meets theology, I love it!
• How to Discern God’s Will in Your Workplace
• I pray for strong faith like this Chinese Pastors‘.
• In case you are looking for some book inspiration …
• …. also how to get more reading done.
• I love it when Economics solves an actual problem.
• Enjoyed the writing not so much the subject of this profile.
• This Humans of New York story just broke me.

Recipes

• Yummy enchiladas
• Braised chicken thighs
• Spicy Coconut Vegetable Stir Fry
• Overnight Oats
• 15 Citrus Recipes
• Roasted Cauliflower and Quinoa Salad
• I want to eat these mashed potatoes …
• … but I am definitely making this Cauliflower and Chickpea Masala.

TED’s winter reading list: 78 feel-good books — ideas.ted.com

Enthusiastic recommendations for reads that will provide you with abundant reasons to rejoice, reflect or recharge, as suggested by TED speakers and TED-Ed educators. If you’re searching for some calm The Peace of Wild Things: And Other Poems by Wendell Berry This little book of poetry is my current morning dose of calm, and I use…

via TED’s winter reading list: 78 feel-good books — ideas.ted.com

In case you are looking for some great reading recommendations and some great TED talks to listen to.

Sunday Reads

• Love how this father dealt with the loss of his wife.
• Is African philosophy a misnomer?
• We recently studied the relationship between Ruth and Naomi.
• Some podcast recommendations.
• I loved this post and all the comments.
• I want to check out this restaurant.

Recipes

• Swedish meatballs

• Apple Cider Braised Chicken

Friday Mood

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Sunday Reads

• Would you keep a journal of all your failures?
• Why is Cape Town so cliquey?
• Please read this post on church planting and then listen to This America’s Life podcast on the same.
• I’d also love to know my family history but what if it yields such a negative story?
• How did you know your person is the one?
• Each of us has elements of being a people pleaser.
• …. because I love talking about #2’s
• This list talks of the world but glaringly omits Africa.
• I love these book club recommendations and the fact that I have read so many of them already. Nice!!

Recipes

• Quick weeknight dinners coz we all need those at some point or another.
• I love potato salad but I hate the creaminess of mayo and that’s absent in this recipe.
• Another yummy pasta recipe.
• .. and another set of recipes.
• Blueberry ice cream for the soul.

caucacity 

Something done with the audacity of white privilege.

An act showing little compassion towards people of color.

 

The Kenyan Land Question

Spent the morning reading about how the Kenyatta family came to amass so much land in Kenya.  It’s not particularly long but I had a few other things to do which meant it took me longer than usual. Here are some interesting excerpts:

A CIA report prepared shortly after Kenyatta’s death said that while Jomo Kenyatta owned only about half a dozen properties covering roughly 4,000 hectares (mainly farms in Kiambu and the Rift Valley), his wife, First Lady Mama Ngina Kenyatta, owned at least 115,000 hectares of land and also had a big stake in ruby mining and in beach resorts around Mombasa.

However, a group led by … opposed the buying of land for resettlement; they argued that Africans could not buy back land that was originally theirs, a contention that did not go down well with Kenyatta because “there were no free things and that land was not free, but must be purchased”. Kenyatta’s position mirrored that of the outgoing British colonial administration … It is believed that one of the main reasons Kenyatta was selected to lead the country’s transition to independence was because he had made a secret pact with the British colonial government not to hurt British and white settler interests in the country.

The criminalisation of groups demanding land justice has created resentment among disenfranchised communities. This does not augur well for the stability of the country. As the TJRC concluded, there is a very close link between land injustices and ethnic violence in Kenya.

… the newly created National Land Commission that is mandated to look into these issues and to bring about some form of adjudication or restitution for the landless has not yet yielded significant results. On the contrary, the Commission has recently been embroiled in various corruption scandals related to land, which has further eroded Kenyans’ hopes of finally settling the land question.

Read the full article and feel something or at the minimum understand the complexity around the land question in Kenya.

Want to be Successful?

⁷ “Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left,that you may be successful wherever you go.

⁸ Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.

⁹ Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:7-9)

True success is found in meditating on the Word of God and in carefully obeying His precepts. I will be honest and say that this is not how I often think of success but my prayer is that for the days to come, this is how I would view it and by the grace of God attempt to live my life out like this.