After seven and a half years, I really really still love my hair. It is now waist-length and just as exciting as when it was first locked. After all these years, I still get excited at having my hair washed, twisted and then styled. Before that I delight myself by looking at pictures online and choosing an appropriate style and then looking forward to the big reveal at the salon. When I see someone with dreadlocks that either have a style I would like, that are dyed beautifully, longer and sometimes even shorter than mine but just look so good, I get the worst dread envy.
And all of the above is how I know that I made the best move and I still don’t regret it. Nah, nope, I am still good. CONFESSION: Come Summer, I do want to trim them slightly shorter, just an itsy bitsy bit.
In the meantime, below are some styles I am looking forward to in the next couple of months.
Below see some pins that have been getting some love on my different Pinterest boards.
Greetings from a rainy and cold-ish Cape Town!
I am not really big on Pinterest but occasionally, I pin stuff and get a lotta love for that. So below, some recent loves and the reason I pinned them in the first place.
And this Baby bonus ….
… I am going to cut my hair like this
I love the fade out and the colour AND it is quite low maintenance, which works well with my hair philosophy that is least effort required.
Love, lust, love love love ….
I was invited to blog on my hair regimen and I started with the fact that since I have dreadlocks, it will be the world’s shortest post EVER! How wrong because as I started to put down the structure of the post I quickly realised that I do (ASIDE: which I guess is the reason for this invitation to share knowledge with each other and stuff). Continue reading ….
Some great reads coming up from a less than warm Joburg morning 🙂
Loving jumpsuits – they allow me to feel playful and grown up
Beautiful home decor, particularly coffee tables
This quinoa recipe
Beautiful loc styles
Her make up. Clean and with her eyes popping
As I get beautiful images, will try and share more as well.
The post’s title is from the Rihanna song that I have been playing in the background all week.
This afternoon, I went to do my hair and got talking to my stylist and this is an abridged version of that conversation.
The guy doing my hair always has this huge turban and looks full on Rastafari and once we got speaking about hair and why we wear our dreadlocks. In my case, it is a hair style but for him it is a whole spiritual thing. He tried to convince me otherwise but we decided to agree to disagree. Then we met today.
He started my asking what I do and when I said, he wanted to know what economists do. Tricky one, without having to go through the limited needs and unlimited wants first year vybe. So then he tried to guess my age and I thoroughly disabused him of the notion that I am a young ‘un. Then silence, while I savoured my hair wash when he randomly asked me if I like to go out (to set the mood, the music at Knoxx is largely Reggae and blares fairly loud) as he was dancing through some song and I twisted my nose and said no. So he asked why not and I said, well, I don’t have time and I am not really a fan of the whole going out scene. Silence again. Then he asked me, are you married? (Side note: I wear a silver band on my left fourth finger AND, I didn’t know where this conversation was headed). So I say yes and he then asked, so does your husband (Side note: always said, I’d call my husband, Hubstar or The Hubs, so henceforth, acquaint yourself with relevant terms) also not go out? I say no, fictitious Hubstar works too hard to go out in the evenings. So he asks, what time is too late and I say, 8 to 9 on most evenings. And then he asks, what time does he leave in the mornings? I say 6:30. So then he asks, doesn’t that put a strain on the relationship. when do you guys get to hang out? And I say at the weekends, and on the few occasions that he does come home earlier than that, we hang out and its not so bad. Then Silence. So later, he asks, do you have kids? I said no. Do you want any? Nope! He then asks, does The Hubs know this, with a look of such pity for the poor imaginary Hubs). So finally, he got talking about himself and his chick and the crux of this post.
He was telling me how God’s order to all of us was to go forth and multiply and that we need to do that. So I nod and ask him if he has any kids and he said no, and how he told his current chick that if they ever had any kids, he would have to have them tested. And first I didn’t hear that bit so I say,huh and he repeats it again. Turns out, he has been with the chick for four years and in the last year, she has stepped out on their relationship and played him and that’s why he told her to her face, turn up preggers and I’m getting the kid tested to check its mine! So then, he goes on to tell me how he found out she had played him. (If you are wondering, I was at the salon for about 1.5 hours, hence the intensity of the conversation.) Apparently, she was crying and this dude came and comforted her and he kissed her and she kissed him back and the rest is history. So he asked her, why didn’t you think of me while you were doing this? Good Q. But apparently, he got so pissed off, he HIT her. He beat her up and then he cut her hair. Apparently, the latter is prescribed by the Rastafari community and for certain “baddies”, the prescribed punishment is cutting of said (spiritual) hair.
What pissed me off about all of this is the double standard. The fact that, he beat her and no one cut his hair and it was fine for him. He went on to say how he had been provoked to the point of no return and how he needed to stand up and let her know she was woman and he was man! There’s other ways to prove this point, me thinks! There is no justification for beating a woman and that’s it! There is nothing more that anyone can say. He tried to argue and say that he had been pushed to breaking point, one time too many and he had to do this. No, nothing like she made you do this. I agree, that in relationships you do have ups and downs and moments when you drive each other to breaking point and while the guy might argue that she made me do it, what does he think she will do when he similarly provokes her? There is no possible explanation to beating women or men. Walk away and when it gets to the point where you are done walking, split up. Its not worth it.
I am not my hair
I am not this skin
I really am not my hair, especially not the fact that I currently have dreadlocks. And have had for the last 15 months or so. People have all sorts of reactions to my choice of hair style and here are a couple:
To me, hair is just hair and the rest is politics. It’s all down to personal preference and nothing more.
I can’t help the fact that people will now call me dreads or rasta. I have also been offered a joint but that doesn’t faze me. I have had my hair relaxed between the ages of 12 and 23 and then I had it natural for a bit and then I locked it. If who I am had been determined by what I had on my hair, then what would that make me? If not a chameleon? I just think my hair is my crowning glory as a woman and I would never cut it all off, but that’s a discussion for another day.
Stuff that I have come across today.
Why my dreads will itch for some time. Coupled with the fear that one of them will split in between and be SHORTER than the rest….can’t shake it off.
And then I discovered this/ her
I guess, its bad when lecturers cant muck on their undergraduate students, right? I don’t really mind, question was why was it allowed to begin with?
I really want to start a book club, then while trawling through stuff, I discovered this club. Now if only I drove a car, and could get there and out fast?
And that’s me in links….:-)
Six weeks ago, I went and finally locked my hair. It has been a lovely experience, through the scratching and the itchy feeling in the first few weeks, which they say is totally normal and has since reduced, which they also say should happen… I love the experience a lot. I am so impatient though for them to grow and get long and for them to bond already…SIGH, SIGH..
Had Greek with my family this last Sunday and this is what I ate….
It seems that May is the month that I decide to do new things! Five years ago I stopped eating red meat this month and this last Sunday I went and cut off my hair and dyed it copper red and just for kicks had them do a shaggy thing or other! I can’t remember the last time I had short hair but it is very liberating and a key step to the new me…. Sometimes as an individual we(I) wish to make certain changes in our personal lives but so many things tend to hold us back and though we are miserable, we keep hearing what they are saying rather than the quiet little voice within us. And for me, this is the ultimate whenever I hear of the life unlived!! Which leads me to wonder, what would I do if I didn’t have to seek the approval of anyone else and all that counted was my God and I?
Monday was Africa Day and just the weekend before that I caught myself wondering what it means for us 20-somethings to be African in this day and age? What does it mean for us as women? In addition to everything else that my parents have given me over the years, the thing that I am most grateful to them about is the fact that we were brought up in another nation and totally surrounded within the peoples culture which has given me a greater appreciation of what home is and what it means to live amidst “strange” friends and acquaintances! So enjoy being African, I mean what else would we want???
When the mountain is steep
when the valley is deep
when the body is weary
when we stumble and fall
When the choices are hard
when we’re battered and scarred
when we’ve spent our resource
when we’ve given our all
In Jesus name we press on
In jesus name we press on
dear lord, with the prize
clear before our eyes
we find the strength to press on
I listened to a LOVELY sermon this morning at Church and it was all about Joy. I thought of that shady programme a large majority of us grew up watching called “Joy Bringers” and I thought, what I might need to know about are the joy stealers in my life. What are those things that keep weighing me down? Each time I feel a sadness and a loss/ heaviness in my heart- what are those things that bring me to that point right there? I think for most of last year was the feeling of failure to magnitudes and dimensions so far unthought and unimagined. The whole quarter life crisis is the most unspoken thing that I THINK I had to deal with last year and have I found myself? I think growing up is tough to do but what I learnt is that it doesnt happen all at once- its gradual and on some score I might do well and then at still other times, fail miserably. The lesson though is to keep at and to realize that Joy supersedes my present circumstances. Psalm 13 summarizes this thought well:
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and every day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.
6 I will sing to the LORD,
for he has been good to me.
Today I admit that I have failed on this one score thus far BUT YET will I choose to rejoice in the Lord unfailing love and admit His banner over me that is love.
I finally did my hair jana and it looks lovely. The salonist was a man and I am not too comfy with that coz i find it too intimate but he wasnt too bad really 🙂 Have a not too heavy week ahead, an assignment due on Tuesday morning, a CAT kesho evening that I havent started on but the Joy of the Lord is my what?