HHP is one of the first South African musicians I ever loved and in some ways he reminds me of the Mr so hearing of his death yesterday was bittersweet on so many levels.
Today, I want to focus on my parents and the values they have imparted in me that I admire and hope to replicate with my children.
- Their work ethic. My parents inspired my sisters and I to work hard, to be our best and not to be limited by gender, our circumstances or other life setbacks. They themselves came from such humble beginnings and accomplished so much that by their actions and choices, you were inspired to try your best.
- Their relationship with money. As far as I know, my parents never bought anything on credit. If they couldn’t save and get it, they did not get it. Also, to save all your money, save even if you have no immediate plans, just save.
- Family first. My sisters and I always knew (know) that we were important and that we mattered to them, that they gave us their best and withheld nothing from us. They loved and even, liked us, and we never doubted this. We are our parents best investment and choice and there is something comforting in that.
- I love that their parenting style did not require them to compare any of us. To them, we are unique, we are individuals and each success was celebrated on its own and each failure dealt with separately. As a result, all five of us are friends and continue to do the same thing with each other to date.
- Faith and the role of God. He is over and above all things, always has and always has been.
- Choice. Marry when you want, there is no pressure to marry or in fact conform because we are women. Study what you want at school – whether Physics or Home science. Learn how to slaughter a chicken or change a tyre, just because you are only girls, you still need to know.
- A love for books. Yes!!!
Posted in books, Heart matters, home, Motherhood/ Parenting
Tagged about me, books, family, finances, life, life lessons, parenting, parents, reading, saving, tribute, values, women, work
In this case, my partner. What do I love most about him? There are so many things, but I had to list the top three:
- His devotion to family. I don’t think we would work so well if we did not have this in common or if we were not assured of the others commitment to their family and therefore each other.
- His ambition and work ethic. Outside of myself and my female friends, he is easily the most driven and hard working person that I know. I suspect that he even works harder than me, always gives 150% of himself, always, every day.
- His ability to chill. He is the perfect epitome of work hard and play hard. And to be honest, I need that because even when we go on holiday, I usually have 10,000 things planned and he is OK to do only one thing a day.
- Lastly, I know said three, but this must be said, his relationship with money. His aversion for credit, his desire to save, his eye on the long-term. All of this and more.
What do you love most about your significant other?
Posted in Heart matters, home, marriage
Tagged about us, being married, character, life lessons, lists, marriage, money, relationships, values, work
I recently went through an exercise to define my top values in life and it made me very reflective because values are something you never think of until someone crosses it then you realise, woah! something is off here.
- My faith in God is something that I feel very strongly about and hope that people realise when they meet me. It guides my decisions, my reactions and my feelings through life. I believe in One God, the Father the Almighty, One God in Three Persons, He died and rose again and will return. That God, even when things in life go against this thinking, my prayer is I stand in my belief in God.
- Family is very important to me. Loyalty to family, love for family. Enjoying your family. My sisters are truly God’s best gift to me and if we weren’t related, I would still want to know. My folks are the bomb.com. I always say that I would pay good money to live with them for a month some where. With the Mr, the idea is to make our home a home so we both have this enabling and loving environment where we both return to and just want to dwell in and enjoy each other. As you get older and refine your circle of friends, you ostensibly end up with friends that are like family and it is important to cherish those as well and invest in them. Friendship is important.
- Serving God and fellow man is another thing of importance to me. If I do not give back to those that are less fortunate, if I am not moved by the plight of those less fortunate than me, then what I have is not worth it. Serving in Church is an expression of my faith and that must be done but I also still delight in that.
- Working hard and being my best given my constraints is important. I love to set goals and work towards them and that feeling of meeting them and sometimes even exceeding expectations is so refreshing. I am not so concerned about being the first or the best, but being my best is good enough.
- How I work hard is by being resilient. I take stock of the failure or the setbacks and then moving forward. I care about meeting my goals and not giving up when things are tough or not going as well as I expected.
- Stability and Freedom that often comes from being educated or being financially stable. Also, from having family or friends do what they say they will, when they will do it. It helps clarify life and make things much simpler for you to really perform at that optimum level. As a worker, I also find that I like the autonomy to make my own decisions and work at my own pace as opposed to being micro-managed.
- Fun and Play because you need to refresh, slow down and enjoy the successes otherwise they are useful and you do not perform at your optimum. For me this looks like reading books, listening to music, hanging with friends and family, journaling, watching telly or traveling.
What are your top values? What defines you and makes you unique?
Posted in books, Heart matters, home, marriage, school, working
Tagged about me, faith, family, friendship, heart, Heart matters, life, life lessons, values
Do you have song that reminds of you a very specific memory?
Posted in home
Tagged about me, music
Having said that, there were some nice parts to living in Cape Town and I am surprised to admit that I will miss the city, in particular:
- I made some great, life long friends which I did not expect to, with the talk of Cape Town being so cliquey.
- I much preferred the mountain to the ocean truth be told.
- There was greater work-life balance.
- PechaKucha was organised more often.
- Not having to go into a mall for any small thing, you could get it at a local shopping centre.
- Driving slowly and no one hooting at me.
- Milder winters …
So I moved back to Joburg a couple of months back and I must say I am enjoying it and if I thought I loved the city before, I love it even more now. What do I love so much about the city?
- I didn’t realise how much I had missed the greenery and the trees, particularly in the area I live.
- The grime of the city and the fact that there is a beautiful imperfection.
- The warmth of the people and their sheer diversity in terms of race, nationality, creed and all other ways.
- My family and close friends live here.
- Multi-lane highways that get you where you need to go faster 🙂
- It was so much easier to join my local library.
- Hot summers and thunder showers.
Today I am grateful for:
- BSF and the brilliant notes they have been preparing for this years study.
- Great friends.
- Our home and all that it means to us in this season.
- My family and for WhatsApp that allows us to be in touch.
- Beautiful Johannesburg weather.
- Oranges, pawpaw and yoghurt.
- The freedom that my car provides me.
- Work and the ability to earn an income.
- A great cup of tea.
- Flavoured sparkling water.
For what are you grateful for?
Posted in Heart matters, home, working
Tagged Book of Joshua, BSF, BSF International, driving, family, food, friendship, home, Johannesburg, thanksgiving
I have read a couple of great books but recently I just hit a brick wall and can’t seem to get into anything. So I have a couple of books that I am trying to get into:
Have you read any of these books and if so, in what order would you recommend them?
Faith is believing that no matter what happens, God will give you the strength and courage you need to get through. With Love, Dr. KL Author of “Every Day Isn’t Perfect”: amazon.com/author/iamklregister
via Wednesday Wisdom — Dr. K. L. Register
43 So the Lord gave Israel all the land he had sworn to give their ancestors, and they took possession of it and settled there.
44 The Lord gave them rest on every side, just as he had sworn to their ancestors. Not one of their enemies withstood them; the Lord gave all their enemies into their hands.
45 Not one of all the Lord’s good promises to Israel failed; every one was fulfilled.
Joshua 21:45 (NIV)
This year’s study of BSF begun with the book of Joshua and I am in awe of God and His faithfulness to His Word and His Character. God never lies and He can be depended on always as we see in these three remarkable verses above. I can trust God with my present and future cares, wishes and thoughts. He can be trusted.
I have also learnt about obedience through Joshua’s response to God’s commands. He was swift in His obedience and He always trusted that God would come through for him and the Israelites. How was he so sure? Because he abided in God’s word and spent time in prayer such that he knew what to ask, how to trust and how to obey. I want that, don’t you?
Posted in Heart matters, home, marriage, Motherhood/ Parenting
Tagged Christianity, eggplant, faith, Heart matters, homosexuality, Johannesburg, marriage, Podcasts, reading, recommendations, Sunday Reads
Posted in books, Heart matters, home, life, marriage
Tagged Cape Town, family, Heart matters, history, journaling, love, pasta recipe, Poo, recipes, relationships, Sunday Reads, words we need
You know those books that everyone raves about and then try as you might you just can’t get into them and then when you do it just feels like they will neither start nor end? Well, these are mine, now I just stop and move onto the next book
- My Brilliant Friend – Elena Ferrante
- How to Read the Air – Dinaw Mengistu
- All the Light we cannot see – Anthony Doerr
- Their Eyes were Watching God – Zora Neale Hurston
- Rachel’s Blue – Zakes Mda (South Africa)
And then there is Open City by Teju Cole that I hated but had to finish so I could hate on it 🙂
Spent the morning reading about how the Kenyatta family came to amass so much land in Kenya. It’s not particularly long but I had a few other things to do which meant it took me longer than usual. Here are some interesting excerpts:
A CIA report prepared shortly after Kenyatta’s death said that while Jomo Kenyatta owned only about half a dozen properties covering roughly 4,000 hectares (mainly farms in Kiambu and the Rift Valley), his wife, First Lady Mama Ngina Kenyatta, owned at least 115,000 hectares of land and also had a big stake in ruby mining and in beach resorts around Mombasa.
However, a group led by … opposed the buying of land for resettlement; they argued that Africans could not buy back land that was originally theirs, a contention that did not go down well with Kenyatta because “there were no free things and that land was not free, but must be purchased”. Kenyatta’s position mirrored that of the outgoing British colonial administration … It is believed that one of the main reasons Kenyatta was selected to lead the country’s transition to independence was because he had made a secret pact with the British colonial government not to hurt British and white settler interests in the country.
The criminalisation of groups demanding land justice has created resentment among disenfranchised communities. This does not augur well for the stability of the country. As the TJRC concluded, there is a very close link between land injustices and ethnic violence in Kenya.
… the newly created National Land Commission that is mandated to look into these issues and to bring about some form of adjudication or restitution for the landless has not yet yielded significant results. On the contrary, the Commission has recently been embroiled in various corruption scandals related to land, which has further eroded Kenyans’ hopes of finally settling the land question.
Read the full article and feel something or at the minimum understand the complexity around the land question in Kenya.
Posted in Heart matters, home, Motherhood/ Parenting
Tagged Africa, Africa's a Country, bible god, Bible Study, cooking, gardens, grandparents, ice cream, ice cream maker, marria, North Korea, parenting, Quinoa, race, racism, recipe, technology, The Confidence Gap